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Love & Marriage: Phyllis Lyon & Del Martin reflect on activism, love & the future.
By Matthew Heil @ EchoMag.com

Phyllis Lyon & Del Martin

Phyllis Lyon & Del Martin are two of the best-known lesbian activists in the country. The San Francisco duo founded the first lesbian organization in the United States, The Daughters of Bilitis, in 1955, & it's accompanying newsletter, The Ladder. They fought with the National Organization for Women to see recognition of lesbian issues in the 1960s & '70s. And most recently, the couple was the first in the country to wed in a same-sex marriage ceremony in San Francisco. Their very public marriage drew praise from around the world, flowers & cards from friends & strangers. "And a lot of media attention, too, of course," joked Martin.
    
For all their achievements in GLBT equality, Lyon & Martin will be honored at the Arizona Human Rights Fund "State of the Union" dinner on 26 June 2004. It's a fitting tribute to the couple, who celebrated their 51st anniversary together this year. Speaking to the two women, it's apparent that their love of activism is bested only by their love for each other. During the interview, they often finished each other's sentences, & recalled fondly the changes they've seen through a life of fighting for equality.

Lyon noted that, for many years, GLBT organizations didn't actually include the word "lesbian" in their titles, & most didn't have lesbian leadership. And while Stonewall is perhaps the most visible milestone of GLBT liberation, it certainly wasn't the first.

"That was not the beginning of the movement, the movement started 20 years before," Lyon said. "Stonewall certainly jacked it up a bit, & in some ways that's the same thing the marriage issue has done. It created a windstorm of activity across the country."

As to their part in the lesbian rights movement, & the GLBT movement as a whole, both women are modest. Martin notes that neither woman thought her actions would grow into anything so huge. Daughters of Bilitis started with eight women, who were trying to find a safe social outlet to express themselves. What it became was as much a surprise to them as everyone else.

"All we did is sort of start things going, & then it kept growing & growing & growing," Martin said.

"We were just fortunate, but we were also desperate to meet more lesbians," Lyon added. "Not because there weren't any, but because we were too shy to approach them in the bars."

In the group, women could admit to their attraction to women, & dance together without fear of police raids. The group could only be promoted by word-of-mouth, for fear of leaving a paper trail people could follow.

"We're talking about 1955, & at that time people were being fired for being gay, being thrown out by their families. The concept was that we were all immoral & illegal & sick," Lyon said.

The ranks of the Daughters grew — extremely slowly. After a year of meeting at other people's homes, they'd only added four women to their number.

So more than half a century in activism lends some perspective to the current struggle for equality. While it may seem that gays & lesbians are under an unprecedented assault right now from the Religious Right, Lyon sees how far gays & lesbians have come. Back when Lyon & Martin first met, the whole notion of marriage wasn't only unthinkable, for many lesbians, it was undesirable.

"Back in those days, the whole concept of marriage was just a patriarchal construct which put women down, & put men in the drivers seat, so lots of us were saying even if we could, we wouldn't get married," Lyon admitted.

Times have changed — now marriage is one of the foremost issues of gay activists, & the National Organization for Women which considered lesbians "the lavender menace" under Betty Friedan, has openly lesbian women serving in national leadership positions.

Both Martin & Lyon have been the subject of numerous stories about the early days of GLBT rights, including a documentary film: No Secret Anymore: The Times of Del Martin & Phyllis Lyon. The film chronicles the women's life in activism together, through interviews, photographs, & news accounts. Filming for the movie took over three years. Sundance Channel will air the film in June.

"It was interesting, it was also exhausting, Lyon said of the filmmaking process. "The filmmaker did a fantastic job, & we came out pretty good."

Now Lyon & Martin have redirected some of their activism to other causes, like senior life with Old Lesbians Organizing for Change. Both women are now in their later years, so issues of ageism are pressing — like trying to change the notion that "old" is a bad word. Asked why they added age activism to their list of causes, Lyon laughed.

"Well, we got old, & some of those issues came very close to home," she said. "I'm going to be 80 in November, & it's really strange, to say the least." "I never dreamed I'd ever live to be eighty, & I'm 83," Martin added.

But at heart, both women are still most dedicated to the GLBT equality movement they helped push forward. Even though some people may disagree with the tactics of those like San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newstrom, Lyon believes change can & must come, even if people gay & straight alike think it's not the "right time."

"It used to be just the straights that told us that," Lyon said "It's not the wrong time for that. Now we've got our own people saying that. I think there's never a perfect time to do anything." Martin agrees.

"As far as we're concerned, there's no going back. This issue's come out & run across the country ... & done more than any of us ever dreamed of. And all any of us can do now is keep it going."